Giving Yourself Away…

6 09 2015

From time to time over the years I have heard from people (mostly married women) that they have done everything they can to please their partner, and take care of their children or some combination of that.  They have sacrificed themselves in some way.  They feel they have compromised themselves for years for the relationship or to raise their children.  Maybe their mother was like this.  They put themselves in the space of being secondary.  There is a way they feel they are not truly existing.  They may feel life an appendage in the relationship or they feel they are the caretaker of their partner or the children or both.  The do not feel like they are a real person but something less than the others in the family.  Most of the time people who live this way eventually find they are so unfulfilled it is preferable to be a lone than to continue the relationship.

Serve is a noble activity, but sacrificing your very beingness to serve others is not necessary or even healthy.  We must all live as if we are worthy.  As if we have value.  We all have as much value as the others we are in relationship with.  If we sacrifice our humanity and become some servant android that takes care of everyone else’s needs we are not complete.  Not fulfilled.  We have sacrificed too much.  This is not service to those we love, it is servitude.  The thing about it is, it is self-imposed.  We feel we must do this role to please those we love.  We must be less than we truly are.  We stifle ourselves to meet our loved ones imagined expectations.  Often these expectations are not actually communicated but we think this is what is expected of us.  Certainly when we put ourselves aside and give in a way that is too much to another they are likely going to accept.  They will often not be conscious enough to realize that you are causing yourself harm by this kind of servitude, by selling yourself short.  By not being a full authentic person.

There is nothing about you that is small.  Do not exile yourself to a minor role in life that is not fulfilling.  You are unlimited.  You can have what fulfills you.  Do not train your loved ones to treat you as less than you truly are.  The amazing thing is that you are so powerful that you can reduce yourself down to a role that does not fulfill you in any way, and you can train others around you to treat you in such a way that it reinforces the role you have decided to play.

Now if you are playing this role to learn some deep life lesson that is part of the journey, but it that was what you are facing would you find yourself feeling less than or unfulfilled?  Do not be small, be you.  Your full authentic you.  Be the one you truly are rather than settle for a shadow of who and what you are.  Retrain yourself, and those around you that you are a powerful, equal being who is worthy of all that life can bring.  You are not small, you are so much more than that.  See yourself through the eyes of your most profound teachers.  They do not see a small being, they may see a being playing the game of small but they do not see small.  Be full blown.  Be all of it.  If your journey is to play small, then play small from a place of healthy power and intention.  Know that your are being small for a purpose, and if there is no purpose in the play then it may be time to change the script.  Time to grow into the your fullness.  You are not small.  You are not less.  You are not insignificant.  Those things do not exist for one of your nature.  You are unique, and amazing, and unlimited.

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